Friend:
I had an interesting thought today. So, Wilhemina gave me back the short
story thing where the mom dies, and she just didn't get it. She said
she couldn't figure out why the main character ran away and was on a
boat. She said she thought it should be more sympathetic to the dad,
not just the main character. Some of the stuff she brought up was
good, like there's no clear indication whether the main character is a
boy or a girl. But yeah, there was a lot of stuff she didn't get.
Did any of that bother you?
Anyway, I was thinking about it and this is not the first time that
has happened. She didn't understand my war poem. Some of my essays
seemed to confuse her. I'm starting to wonder if the way she reads and
the way I write is just incompatible. I don't think it's a problem
with the way she reads, because she understands other stuff just fine,
and I don't think it's necessarily a problem with the way I write
because other people usually understand my writing. I think it's just
that they aren't compatible.
I think she wants me to tell her what to think. And that's not
something I'm good at. I can't get across a clear message. I do not
write for the purpose of getting a main idea across. I think she wants
main idea and believes story for the sake of story doesn't have any
value. She wants it to mean something. She wants me to tell her
outright to feel sorry for the dad, when I want her to decide whether
or not to feel sorry for him. She wants to see the steps my character
took between his mother's death and his sitting in a boat crying about
it while I just want to tell about his mother's death and that he ran
away and leave the rest to imagination. I want her to fill in the rest
of the story from her own head. I don't want to tell her what to
think. I flat out refuse to tell my readers what to think. I want them
all to make their own judgments and look at both sides of the argument
without me telling them exactly what to think. I want people to read
my writing and have their own thoughts about it, not my thoughts.
I guess it's fine the other way. Maybe some authors want everyone to
think the same thing when they read those authors' books. Maybe that's
what significance means: the author tells you what to think. Some
people like that. Wilhemina likes that. But I don't like it. It's about
taste. I like those books that take you to new worlds where you have
to start over learning the rules and thinking and it's so new and
different and impossible to explain in full that each person will have
an entirely different view of it. Utter Chaos. I love that. Some
people, though, want books that take everyone to exactly the same
place, that tell the exact same story to each person, provided the
person can understand what the author wanted them to think. Those
books get a message across. Those books tend to expose some sort of
human or societal flaw.
In any case, Wilhemina doesn't understand my writing, and maybe it's just
because we're on opposite ends of the spectrum. She keeps looking for
what I'm trying to tell her to think, and I'm not trying to tell her
to think anything. Or maybe I'm wrong and my writing really is
confusing, but most people just don't mind enough to point it out.
What do you think?
My reply:
First, sorry for not getting to this sooner, I wanted time and a computer keyboard when I replied to this.
None of the stuff that Wilhemina mentioned bothered me when I read the story. I don't know. Maybe Wilhemina's never wanted to run away when things got bad in her life? I know I have. But I also know that the feeling of wanting to run away, especially when you're young and your life is falling to pieces, is rather universal. Kids run away lots. The boat thing I just assumed was part of the running away. I don't see why it would have to be more sympathetic to the dad, I think that would make the narrative out of character. Your protagonist is grieving, and blames the father for what happened. Sympathy is asking a bit much out of a kid. (more like a pre-teen, but you get my point). It's out of character, and I think that would make your story weaker. Adults can comprehend why they should feel sympathy and show it, but even when we grieve we don't tend to do that. Empathy and sympathy are some of the first things to go when we get hurt, especially emotionally. And the boy/girl thing doesn't really matter, I always thought it was a boy, but I know you tend to write with boys. Just like I really didn't need time tags in my story until now, you really don't need gender tags. It's not important.
I think you also made some very good points. Actually, after reading this email, I was on twitter and I found this really cool quote: "I think it’s important to leave spaces in a story for readers to fill in from their own experience." Annie Proulx.
I think it's important too. And I like your definition of significance, because honestly in all my years of english classes, I never really got what defined what was significant or not. Wilhemina would get mad at me because what I thought was significant she didn't think was significant, or I didn't like what she thought was significant, because I felt like it had no bearing on what I got from the story.
I feel like... I don't know. What I do know is that what I write for english teachers I don't write in the stories I really want to write. I would let all my english teachers read my blog in a heartbeat. I know they would like it. I'm really proud of it, and I use a lot of what I learned in english in my posts. Wilhemina would get a kick out of it, it's essentially what she assigns for essays just I get more leeway in what I want to write about. But I wouldn't let Wilhemina read Shades. Or my fanfiction or that other story I finished or angsty love story or Soul of Death. She wouldn't like it.
Because as much as I ragged on your short story today for not filling in all the blanks in the story, I really love when a story has some well-placed blanks. I get to decide what happened, until more information comes in and says what happened, but until then, I, the reader, get the power of writing a portion of that story.
Ok, and now I have to go on a rant, because I agree with you, Wilhemina's showing signs that she wants you to tell her how to think. And I have some issues with that. Sooooo many issues. One big one being that she's a teacher, and the point of education (at least, my opinion on the point of education) is that the goal of it is so I can learn how to think for myself. NOT to tell me what my thoughts should be. If I wanted that, I'd stay ignorant and dependent on others for what my opinions should be. And she's a teacher. She's supposed to be expanding her student's knowledge and critical thinking skills, but she can't utilize them herself in reading a honestly very simple short story. We learn best when we are not taught merely what to think, but how to think for ourselves. That's a purpose stories serve, is to teach us how to think. They open our minds and show us that there's more than what we're told. They remove limits, not put them in place.
Also, I feel like your writing, as well as lots of other writing I like reading for all the reasons mentioned above, appeal to the readers in a more emotional fashion than logically. I mean, both are entwined in a story, obviously, but your story was very emotional. All the supposed blanks Wilhemina saw were easily filled with emotion. To explain in words would take away the emotion that the lack of words places. Writing isn't just knowing what to write, it's also knowing when to not write, and just to let it live on paper.
And yes, I agree, some books are more logical and tell you what to think. I think that those books, while they may be very well written and done and significant have a heavy risk, in that there's a good chance if no one understands what the point is, that the story will have lost all meaning. Because what means one thing to one person doesn't mean the same thing to other people, and that's why stories are so amazing, because you can get so many different interpretations, and they're all right. Each one individually is right for that person. And exposing flaws is fabulous, I mean, look at the blog post I just wrote about the Dark Knight. I loved the story, and there was a huge societal flaw exposed, but it didn't tell me how to think. The flaw was exposed by the bad guy, I mean, why would you listen to what the bad guy has to say? Really? He's the bad guy. People aren't going to listen to a bad guy to better themselves.
But the story wasn't told with just logic and with the express purpose of exposing the flaw that people are selfish and sometimes stupid with moral ambiguity problems. It was about Batman, and the transformation he underwent during the course of the movie. With lots of blanks in that story, that we could only fill in with imagination and some phenomenal acting.
I think, overall, that Wilhemina is a twitchy teacher who might need a crash course in the creative part of creative writing. I'd also like to see her write a story instead of grading it, so that she can be more in touch with what you're all trying to do. I think that your writing is fine. It's not perfect, and I will never tell you that it's perfect, because you can always improve. I think that story was good and well-told. I feel there is a sort of inevitability to your clashing, but who changes what remains to be seen. You might want to sit down and talk with her about it, if it's really bothering you, or write her a letter (you'll feel more eloquent that way, and won't have to deal with her interrupting your speaking) and give it to her, detailing your feelings on the gap between your writing and her understanding. I've yet to find your writing confusing me, which is the opposite with the grades I got in Wilhemina's class, most of which confused me to no end. She had trouble finding the points I wanted to make as well.
And finally, don't let her get to you. She's just a high school english teacher. The unique position of being both highly important and trivial at the same time. Your education is what you make of it. What you learn is more important than what they teach, and if they match, all the better for you. If they don't quite match, rest assured that you're getting a life view sadly few people get nowadays--learning beyond the curriculum. Even if all you learned was that when you email me really long emails like this you get even longer ones back because I like to talk about writing and education.
This is a totally normal conversation between two totally normal girls.... yeah... completely normal.
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